SOS! (Saving Our Sanity) in This Election

And Beyond

I’m moving my regular Tuesday post to Monday this week as we push ahead and through the election. 

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Are you ready for this election to be over? Me too. 

Remember when we used to vote for the ‘least bad’ candidate, and the biggest feeling we had when ‘our person’ didn’t win was disappointment?

Remember when the results of an election didn’t feel like the world as we knew it would end?

Remember when elections were mostly about policy and less about, well, I don’t even know what it’s about anymore.

I’d love to go back to those days. 

But I digress.

It all feels so angry and emotional, and it got me wondering, 

Can we save our sanity (SOS!) in this election (and beyond)?

I’m not different from most of you. I feel strongly about how things will turn out on November 5th (or whenever it might be resolved). I believe if the ‘other person’ wins, it will be bad for the country. I’m fearful about how things might change. I’m nervous, I’m anxious. I am in my feelings.

And

I don’t want the speculation, doubt, and uncertainty I feel to steal my peace. I know there are a few key things I can do to keep this from happening. I also know I’ll need to pull some levers, and some of it won’t be easy - if you’d like to join me and help save your own sanity, read on. 

Before we begin, I’d like us to remember:

Hating them won’t make you feel better.

Focusing on what you can control will. 

Let’s dive in.

Things we can control outside of ourselves - (I know you know, but let’s refresh, shall we?)

1. Limit media consumption

(Boundaries in this area are very important).

Do not sit around with the news on all day. It will make you crazy. Make sure what you consume is from a reliable source. Better yet, seek media that represent different sides of the story. Try and get a well-rounded view. Ensure that what you consume educates you and does not stoke the fire of fear within. Effective lies always contain a kernel of truth, and many media outlets are taking that ‘one thing’ and positioning it to represent the entire story when it’s not the entire story. 

Don’t take it in 24-7. Limit your time when gathering information, and then go live your life!

2. Be aware of how you feel when you discuss politics with others. (see below)

Things we can control on the inside - (Yes, you can do this.)

1. Focus on how you feel

How does what you’re doing/thinking about/talking about make you feel? 

Find something to feel good about. Even if it’s, ‘my cat is so cute’ - do it. You get to define your inner world.  You get to decide what consumes you. If you’re in anxiety and despair, reach for a better feeling thought. 

2. Schedule time to contemplate, speculate, and worry (if you must)

I’m not saying to put your head in the sand - it makes sense you don’t want to put your head in the sand, and you shouldn’t. Putting boundaries on how much time you allow to worry about the unknown can help you enjoy life. Gather facts, create your positions - inform yourself, yes. Ruminate over it 24-7, no.

3. Focus on what you want

Don’t worry about what the other person is doing - focus on what you’re doing to help create the world you want to live in. Focus on what you can control - instead of putting your energy into how XYZ upsets you, find something you can do /say/talk about that points you toward feeling more powerful.  We DO have agency - we are NOT powerless. 

4. Get curious

No matter what happens, half of us will be devastated by the outcome of this election (it feels so BIG). It also feels like a no-win situation. Seek to understand the other side. People want to be seen. What if we challenged ourselves to try and understand the other person's point of view?

You don’t have to agree with them (or be friends with them or whatever), but when people feel seen, they soften. There’s a chance for the hammer of judgment to release and a greater chance for them to understand you.

5. Work with your triggers

If you’re having trouble ‘letting go’ of the panic, you might be triggered. 

A deeper dive into what’s driving the rumination can serve you well. 

Grab your journal, get quiet, and ask:

What am I feeling right now?

Where is it in my body?

When was the first time I can remember having a feeling like this? (from childhood)

What is this part trying to tell me?

What does this part need me to do to let go?

Sit with that for a bit. Feel what comes up so you can metabolize it in your body, and begin to let it go. 

Here’s what feels true right now:

• People want to be seen - they want to be known. All of us. 

• It can feel out of control if ‘they’ win, and it’s likely out of your control regardless of who wins. 

• You cannot control who wins.

• We are divided.

• We can choose to come together or continue this division.

• We can challenge ourselves to see the ‘other’ as fully human.

And finally, the thing that irks me to no end, but I was reminded of this morning by my Co-Star app:

Try to send loving -kindness to someone you find intolerable today. 

A total cringe, I know. I’m resistant to it, so it’s probably exactly what I need to do. I’ll try anyway.

I’m ready to find some peace in this crazy world. How about you?

LYLAS -

S