11 Comments
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Lolly Martyn's avatar

All the feels reading this. I found you on Sarah's introductions. This was so honest. xx

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Sara Stansberry's avatar

Thank you, Lolly. IYKYK

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Adrienne J's avatar

I'm not quite there yet, my oldest turns 16 this year.

I do still remember being the one who broke the family Christmas on my husband's side. We were the first ones married and the first ones with a baby.... AND the first ones to decide we wanted to set up our own Christmas morning traditions. It didn't go over well, but we all survived and now I could be only a handful of years from being on the receiving end of that conversation.

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Sara Stansberry's avatar

Yes! I remember that time in my life as well. I also remember how it felt when things 'didn't go over well' with my family of origin. I don't want to put that kind of pressure on my kids. Somehow, I thought I could do this *happily* when the time came. I'm not quite sure, but I do know that I didn't expect to feel this way:-) I also know I'll get used to the new normal eventually.

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Adrienne J's avatar

I imagine I will put a happy and accepting front on as well, since I know what its like to deal with a dysfunctional family of origin. But I will also be dying inside a little. Letting go is hard!

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Jourdana Elizabeth's avatar

I love your raw vulnerability with a splash of humor it’s beautiful. I’m still laughing at “What the f is in Vermont?” lol 😂

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Sara Stansberry's avatar

Thank you! My life is stranger than fiction most days.

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Laura Wilde, PhD.'s avatar

I was just thinking last night about whether my son would want to pay the exorbitant price of an airfare to my place for Christmas and what that might be like this year. When we live in places that aren’t where they grew up it never seems to feel like home for them. But still, wherever we are, Christmas isn’t at all the same without our kids. I’m definitely not ready for that!

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Sara Stansberry's avatar

I feel you! ❤️

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Stacy Smith Rogers's avatar

Oh, friend. When my oldest got married we shifted to celebrating at her house as a collective family with my younger two with me leading up to the big day -- but my inner mama was throwing a hissy fit inside and I had to fake it the first year. After that, I saw how much joy it brought her to host and to execute our favorite traditions.

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Sara Stansberry's avatar

That sounds like a good way to ease into the 'new normal.' Fake it til you make it- I thought we were too old for that, but I guess not - lol! Thanks for sharing how you make it work. :-)

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